Writing Tango Addiction

I think I may have to beg to come back and promise to do everything you want this time and never flirt with your friends just to make you jealous and put some distance in between the intensity of our intimacy.

I wanted to get away from the goons who comment on this blog and to me privately through the blog who think they know me and those who do know me and then go to the blog to dig up my privacy because they can't get me to discuss it.

I didn't think of the lovely people who read and sometimes comment. The people who tell me their stories because hopefully they think someone might validate their experience.

I did start another blog but it's directed at writers. AS I am now going through a hellish editing process where I am expanding the theme of how heinous women can be in friendship and living through all those love affairs again. Also there is a problem with the title. It was to be 'Men With Axes' but my editor says it sounds like a slasher movie. 'Dancing in Dulce de Leche'  has been pushed but that wont play in Peckham. A reader suggested 'Last Tango in Buenos Aires' and I had almost reached that conclusion myself. 'Tango Intensity' and 'Tango Addiction' have also been suggested as a way to mix the dance and heated relationship themes.

Comments

[suzy vegas]

Arlene I absolutely wasnt talking about you in the post - I love your thoughts. Ironically it was directed at a male vitriolic commenter. Also I have hunted down the comment from yesterday but cannot find it. It wasnt deleted - I never delete comments even the nasty anonymous ones from my ex-husband.

The new blog is called 'A Writer's Life in Publishing' directed at people interested in writing and how to get through the mire of getting work past the fools in the editor's offices.

[Jean-Pierre]

Keep me updated on your future writing projects! Where is your new blog?

[Arlene]

I wrote a long comment to your last post and it got deleted! How ironic. FYI I have never thought that you were necessarily writing about your own experiences. I have been the women who might have complained about or experienced the same things. However, I have also learned that people have choices and we don't always make the right choice or we make what we feel is the right choice at the time, but it is still a choice and we must take responsibility for our decisions.
We all experience crap and sometimes we may attract what we subconciously feel we deserve. When this happens we require empathy, but not sympathy. Something I learned through counselling and my counselling skills course. Sympathy involves being sucked into another person's drama and is not actually helpful. Complaining isn't useful either.
I made some bad decisions and my previous partner was not a nice guy. I own up to my decisions and choices and am now over it. End of. What good it it going to do me to complain about his behaviour? Nothing. It doesn't make me feel better knowing other women have gone through similar experiences. If I am saddened, it is because women continue to make the same decisions or mistakes over an over. We need to love/respect ourselves more and take responsibility for our lives. I am trying to find a way to help other women achieve this. I feel it is going to be a long and lonely road.
Good luck with your book. I hope I am not one of those people that you wanted to get away from. If so, you should have said something. All the best.